Six Weeks

I think my last post confirms a suspicion I had -- I have no readers (well, maybe one or two) from Atlanta! I still need to find an OB but I'll sort that out eventually.

This week I began having some difficult symptoms -- nausea, extreme tiredness, and food aversions -- off and on throughout the day. I haven't quite figured out how to manage the nausea and food aversions, which are linked. My aversions aren't exactly specific. It's more like food in general makes me want to gag. A lot of what I've read has suggested eating smaller meals but if I do that, it will be a big change. And I somewhat dread every meal, so if I have to eat six small meals, my daily dread will be doubled. I have found that if I eat something before my stomach gets really empty, the nausea and aversions are held at bay a bit. I have also found that if I make myself eat something, it usually turns out okay. My nausea isn't accompanied by vomiting, at least.

I really want to figure out how to manage this because I hate feeling like this all the time. Last night DH and I had agreed to go get something to eat at one of our favorite neighborhood spots and then I backed out because we waited too long to go and I started feeling miserably nauseous. I apologized and told him I'm afraid I've ruined his life for the next few months. Later, he said he was thinking about what I said and that that's just not so. "It's all about you," he said. Sweet!

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Some of you won't believe this after all of the thought and effort put toward NOT telling the boss -- I told her on Thursday. I was feeling so bad, I became concerned that I was going to have to quickly exit an important meeting or that she was going to notice me dragging myself through each day. The telling turned out just fine. I think she actually likes being the only person in the building who knows. She was very congratulatory and didn't freak out and start asking when my leave would be or talking about how she's going to find someone to cover for me, etc. -- there was none of that. I'm relieved that I told her because I was spending a little bit too much energy keeping it from her. Our offices are next door to each other and it's just easier this way.

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I don't know what it's like in other cities and towns, but in Atlanta, I'm told if you are going to need childcare for an infant, you need to get put on a waiting list as soon as you get pregnant -- and there might be a spot available by the time you need it. A year ago, I took this advice to heart and within less than a week of my first good beta, I started making calls. I got really excited about the possibility of finding a great situation for the baby and about the new relationships we'd have with our child's caregivers. Plus, it made everything seem very real. However, within two days of making those calls, things faltered and they started using the phrase "not genetically viable." Having had these conversations with childcare providers made this even more difficult.

So this week, I made one call. It freaked me out, so I decided to take my chances and wait a bit longer for such research. If worse comes to worse, I have no doubt that my mother, the first-time grandmother who would probably move in with us if I asked her (not gonna happen!), will gladly bridge the gap until our time on the waiting list turns up. Within a few weeks, though, we do need to get a move on finding the best situation we can. This will mean tours of facilities, applications, and wait list fees.

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Our big backyard project is almost complete -- on time! But something horrible like 40% over budget. The contractor and I have had a few moments because he just doesn't listen to me. Does what he wants, even though it is my yard. I haven't had to go so far as to ask him whose yard it is, but I have thought about it. Luckily he usually gets everything right in the end. The whole thing is going to be awesome. So much better than we ever envisioned.  We have two weeks until the inlaws arrive, so we're now in the phase of finishig touches. We're going today to shop for a new outdoor dining table because the one we had picked out is now on back order until 6/30. We may just wait for it because the price was right and it was just what I want.

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So that's about all my news. Not a lot to report. I have not felt like posting much but I have been reading and commenting on others' blogs. Our ultrasound is next Thursday, at six weeks, five days. I'm sure I'll post again after that, if not sooner.